Mermaid or Whale?

French model Tara Lynn

A while back, at the entrance of a gym, there was a picture of a very thin and beautiful woman. The caption was "This summer, do you want to be a mermaid or a whale?"

The story goes, a woman (of clothing size unknown) answered the following way:

"Dear people, whales are always surrounded by friends (dolphins, seals, curious humans), they are sexually active and raise their children with great tenderness.

They entertain like crazy with dolphins and eat lots of prawns. 

They swim all day and travel to fantastic places like Patagonia, the Barents Sea or the coral reefs of Polynesia.

They sing incredibly well and sometimes even are on cds. They are impressive and dearly loved animals, which everyone defend and admires.

Mermaids do not exist.

But if they existed, they would line up to see a psychologist because of a problem of split personality: woman or fish?

They would have no sex life and could not bear children.
Yes, they would be lovely, but lonely and sad.
And, who wants a girl that smells like fish by his side?

Without a doubt, I'd rather be a whale

At a time when the media tells us that only thin is beautiful, I prefer to eat ice cream with my kids, to have dinner with my husband, to eat and drink and have fun with my friends.

We women, we gain weight because we accumulate so much wisdom and knowledge that there isn't enough space in our heads, and it spreads all over our bodies.

We are not fat, we are greatly cultivated.




Every time I see my curves in the mirror, I tell myself: "How amazing am I ?! "

Article: What Size Are You, Really?

What Size Are You, Really? The Truth Behind Vanity Sizing

- Lisa Marsh

Like most new moms, Erin Correale wants to whip her wardrobe back into shape.

Correale has it easier than most. At 38, she’s within 10 pounds of the weight she’s been since her teenage years. But her clothing size isn’t.

“I wear a size two in Ann Taylor, a four in Banana Republic, a six in Old Navy, a four at Coldwater Creek and a friend told me about Chico’s, but told me I would have to look at a size zero,” she says. “I never like size zero—it’s encouraging people to be waifs. That doesn’t make me feel good.”

Sizes zero, two, four and six all for one woman? Is Correale lost in the looking glass, growing and shrinking at every turn like Alice, or is there something seriously askew with the sizing of clothing?

It’s no mistake. The American apparel industry has created an intentional system of “Vanity Sizing.” The increasing use of the smaller sizes—a size 12 in 1970 is now in the size four-six-eight range—is meant to make consumers feel better about buying clothing.

Standards—or Lack Thereof

When it comes to sizing, there are no universal standards. A woman with a traditional hourglass figure with 36-24-36 measurements can wear anything from a size zero to a size ten, depending on the brand and whether it’s sold at the designer, contemporary, junior, bridge or mass level.

The only standard that does exist is to con the buyer into believing she’s smaller. Over time, sizes are getting roomier, allowing women to believe they can still squeeze into a more desirable size two, four, six or even eight.

“At this point, sizes are meaningless. They’re more relative than anything else,” Bill Ivers, chief operating officer of MSA Models told YouBeauty. His agency specializes in providing fit models for designers and brands.

“Sizes are not standard by design,” he explained. “It helps brands be unique and offer an edge over the competition. Brands are looking for brand loyalty and if last season you were an eight and this season you’re a size six, that’s a sales tool. We all look to apparel to make us look good, feel comfortable and confident.”

Even celebrities fall victim to the need for vanity sizing.

One actress cold-called Robert Verdi, style director at FirstComesFashion.com and a celebrity stylist who regularly works with stars like Eva Longoria and Kathy Griffin, and asked him to wardrobe her for multiple appearances during an awards season.

Her publicist said the actress was a size 12, and because they were working on a quick turnaround of less than three weeks, Verdi couldn’t ask designers to make anything custom, so had to rely on pieces designers had in stock.

“We looked at pictures of this woman and I called her publicist back and asked her, is she really a size 12?” he told YouBeauty. “The publicist insisted she was a 12.”

When Verdi and his team packed the dresses up for the trip to Los Angeles, “we snuck in some 14s, 16s and even some 18s.”

Though Verdi told the actress that everything was a “size 12,” the actress “wasn’t happy,” he said. She ultimately wore several of his picks, but one of the dresses was altered to fit by making it six-to-eight inches shorter. The fabric was then added as a panel on the back of the dress so the “size 12” would fit.

“She didn’t want to be bigger than that in her head. A number means so much to so many people,” he added. That's really too bad since the numbers are pretty much meaningless and there are no standards in place.

This lack of sizing standards wasn’t always the case.

Until January 20, 1983, the U.S. Department of Commerce and the National Institute of Standards and Technology offered specifics for the sizing of apparel with body measurements for men, women, junior women, young men and children. These standards began in the late 1940s as a byproduct of the necessity for size-standardization in military uniforms during World War Two. Committees that included textile manufacturers, designers and retailers worked with the Department of Agriculture to determine these sizing standards and all adhered to it.

The program was discontinued in 1983. The measurements were not keeping up with the typical American body, which was changing due to better medicine and nutrition, along with an influx of new and varied ethnic groups. Sponsorship of these standards was assumed by private industry. That marked the start of sizing’s new Wild West, a lawless, volatile environment that continues today.

An End in Sight?

“Each designer has their own vision of what they imagine as the ideal person to wear their clothing,” explained Tanya Shaw to YouBeauty. “Designers will hold true to what they believe.”

Shaw is the founder and president of MyBestFit, a sizing system that scans your body for about 10 seconds and then provides you with sizing recommendations for styles from over 30 brands like the Gap, Old Navy, Talbots and J Brand.

“We help customers decode sizing and that makes shopping as simple as uniformity,” she explained. “We should find clothes that fit our bodies, not sizes we like to hear.”

The company currently operates one scanner at the King of Prussia Mall in the suburbs of Philadelphia, PA, but will be adding 45 more locations in fall 2011. Though a Personal Shopping Guide from MyBestFit in King of Prussia will only provide resources that are in that mall, you can enter your identifying code on the company’s web site to find what other sizes and brands will fit you when shopping at another location or online.

“When you cut the confusion out, consumers buy more,” Shaw said. “They have told us the conversion rate [from shopper to buyer] of 100 customers is normally 20 percent. With MyBestFit, in some cases, it’s as high as 90 percent. Imagine if you went into a fitting room and it all fit—your shopping time is more productive.”

Cricket Lee is taking it a step further and attempting to get standards back into the lexicon of apparel makers and designers. She founded Fitlogic, a patented sizing system that fits by body type and size. Though it is now accepting pre-orders online for fall shipments, Lee has spent five years struggling to bring it to market. Because each brand has its own sizing, designers and apparel manufacturers weren’t interested.

Her labeling categorizes women in three shape groups—circle, hourglass and triangle—and the Fitlogic label carries the traditional size plus a number for one of these categories.

“The truth will set you free and if you know you’re a size four and shape three, you know a size 4.3 in FitLogic will fit you every time,” Lee explained. “Women don’t have the time to mess with trying on sizes. It is debilitating to walk into a fitting room with 10 pairs of pants and have nothing fit.”

“It’s progress and it will happen,” she added. “If this can reduce return by 75 percent, how can designers and retailers ignore it?”

MSA Models’ Ivers is skeptical that day will come. “There is no universal fit and I doubt that there ever will be. If five people take measurements of the same person, there will be five different measurements,” he said. “Consumers have to learn to adapt to the fact that today you’re a size zero and tomorrow, you’re a four.”

While new mom Correale admits she “loved being a size two at Ann Taylor, I didn’t really believe it.” Shopping certainly isn’t any easier. “I don’t know how to shop other than taking three sizes into the fitting room or having someone run back and forth for me. It never works.”

Shopping woes aside, maybe Lee is correct and the truth will set you free. If knowing that a number on a tag is meaningless will free you from getting hung up on sizes and allow you to focus on the best fit for you, maybe it's not such a bad thing after all.

Size 2 = Curvy?

I was logging onto Yahoo Messenger this afternoon and saw this headline:

 

Now I have no issues with Jennifer Love Hewitt as a person (although I don't  follow Celebrity News so really she could be an awful human being and I'd have no idea). What I do have is an issue with media saying that, "Actress Jennifer Love Hewitt proved that real women do have curves upon arriving at the premiere of her latest movie..."

SHE IS A SIZE 2!!!!!

So what I want to know is since when does a size 2 equal "curvy"? I'm not saying her breasts and hips aren't "curvy" but only because the rest of her is so tiny!And what kind of message is that sending to women (and girls) who are sizes 12 or 22?

Bathingsuit Blues not just for Women

I love that the NY Times printed an article about a man having drama with picking a bathing suit. I think sometimes we women forget (or don't realize) we're not the only one's out there with body issues struggling to find the perfect fit.

*          *          *

Does This Swimsuit Make Me Look Fat?

By Henry Alford

IN its Platonic ideal, a bathing suit removes you momentarily from yourself, and perhaps unleashes heretofore dormant aspects of your personality. Wriggle into a great-looking suit that’s black and snug and tailored, and suddenly you’re ready for an underwater cocktail party; rock a pair of floral Hawaiian board shorts and suddenly you’re convinced that the only way to spell “dude” is with two o’s.

My annual quest for such a garment got its kick-start in late May when a friend e-mailed me a link to a site called Socialite Life, which featured a folio of 23 photos breathlessly headlined “Jude Law: Shirtless in Cannes!” Squinting rakishly in the brilliant Mediterranean light, Jude looked worldly, post-coital, regnant.

When you clicked on the upper left hand of the first photo, you learned (incorrectly, I found out too late) that Jude’s fetching canary-yellow bathing suit was from Dsquared2 and cost $268. I downloaded the image, and hied myself to Bergdorf Goodman on Fifth Avenue, where I showed it to a smiley salesman in his 20s named Beau.

I told Beau, “I want to be mistaken for Jude Law.”

I explained, “My looks are kind of preppy and innocent, so I need a suit that will take me to ‘wayward English schoolboy’ rather than ‘toffee-nosed prat.’ ” Beau said, “I understand.”

I did not tell Beau about how I recently dropped my Scrabble board and tiles onto the sidewalk in the middle of Sheridan Square, creating a clattering hailstorm of nerddom; I did not tell Beau that I recently had a heated discussion about the use of the semicolon.

The store, alas, could not find the fetching canary yellow suit, but Beau whisked me through the men’s department, showing me other options. We hit Etro, Michael Bastian, Thom Browne. When we saw six black, slinky suits coiled like snakes in the Dolce & Gabbana section, I said, “Ooh, these might be too Jude Law.”

Once in the dressing room with Beau’s and my three picks, I came face to face with a thorny verity: It is the curse of the middle-aged male body simultaneously to shrink and enlarge. Your belly pooches out, ever more parabolic, while your legs dwindle down to mere sticks, two knobby rods with the surface tension of plucked poultry. One day you look down at your half-sphere atop its two spindly rods and realize, “I’ve turned into a Weber grill.”

The suit most flattering to my Weber grill was a pair of belted, snug-fitting, mid-thigh $230 Orlebar Brown trunks. “These are Jude-like,” I told Beau as we gazed into the fitting rooms’ mirror. “Jude would accessorize them with designer shades, a shirt unbuttoned to the navel, and a whisper of Drakkar Noir masking a base of animal ripeness.” Beau’s eyes widened, and I sensed that he wanted to introduce me to a licensed professional who could tell me all about lithium.

Alas, the color of the Orlebar Brown trunks (fiery tomato) was too bracing for my Pepperidge Farm brand of wholesome. I headed on to Saks, where I showed my Jude photo to three salesmen. But they also couldn’t find the yellow trunks. A thin, expressionless young Michael York look-alike showed me other possibilities, but I demurred. I apologized and said, “I think I’m hung up on looking like ...”

“... Yeah, yeah, yeah: Jude Law.”

Eager not to beat a dead horse, I left my photo of Jude at home for my next two bouts of shopping. During the course of two days, I would visit eight more stores and try on 26 more suits. I loved the festive, Lilly Pulitzer-esque prints at Vilebrequin (which, as I now know, made the Jude Law swimsuit), but the suits’ puffy, bustle-like silhouettes vaulted my pear shape from Bosc to Bartlett; I loved the contained but non-packagey look of one pair of Marc Jacobs’s trunks, but wondered if I wanted to pay $345 for something that would be riding shotgun with a lot of cocoa butter and PABA.

A perfect fit kept eluding me, and kept me from being the best Jude I could be. A pair of knee-length board shorts in a floral print at Osklen in SoHo looked great except for a strange gap they created between their waistband and my spine.

“These make me look like I have a little storage area,” I said to the salesclerk, a sly brunette in her 20s. “A place for pencils or filberts.” (Her: “Yeah.”)

In another instance, it was equally the fit and the fit’s attendant implications that slowed me in my tracks. “I can’t tell what the look is,” I said to an H & M salesclerk referring to a pair of $17.95 tight navy square-cut nylon trunks with a red, white and blue rope belt. I asked, “Is it randy French sailor, or is it Fourth of July picnic on the town green?” Harried, she told me: “They’re Swedish, that’s all I know. They’re from Sweden.”

My favorite salesclerk was a middle-aged woman who was eating a salad when I walked into her tiny, messy boutique, Pesca, on East 60th.

“I like the elastic waistband,” I said of one of her suits, all made by a company called Sauvage; she explained, “they use a very good Lycra.” She left her desk to come look at me standing in front of the mirror in a sky-blue mid-thigh number. “I’m 49 years old,” I told her, “but in these I look 48.” She said I looked sexy. I thought of my Jude fixation and confessed to her, “I probably want the world to think I’m sauvage, but in reality I’m more domestique. In reality, I’m more médecin de campagne.” She asked if I was a doctor.

I finally hit pay dirt at Parke & Ronen, a Chelsea boutique that sells many scanty men’s clothes hammered in the forge of brazen confidence. The store’s fitting mirror, unlike the ones at all the other stores I visited, faces out onto the street. The mirror’s daunting amount of requisite exhibitionism rattled me when I skittishly looked at myself in the first suit, but by suit No. 5, calmed by the store’s friendly staff, I was shirtless, unfazed and furtively bopping to the Lady Gaga throbbing over the sound system.

I loved a pair of fitted $95 Parke & Ronen four-inch trunks in a blue, green and purple floral paisley on a white background; they had a two-grommet tie waist that cinched away all Weber-based impurity. The suit’s overall effect was slightly ... swinging London. Slightly ... Jude Law dirty weekend. Kuh-ching.

I first wore the suit to the N.Y.U. pool, where its comparative jauntiness, against a backdrop of collegiate Speedos and board shorts, was galvanizing. I can’t say I swam any faster, but I certainly swam with more verve.

I wore it one sunny afternoon on my building’s roof deck, where I didn’t need to sip at a Pimm’s Cup or a Campari; both were implied. I wore it to my office one hot day. Indeed, so comfortable and unbosomed was I in it that I decided to wear it for a trip I’ve happily made four times before: out to Amagansett, where I like to spend the night on the beach.

I made a reservation on the jitney. Doubting that any changing room would be open by the time I reached the beach at 7 p.m., I wore the suit under my pants to make the trip out to Long Island; as I boarded the bus, I found myself smiling slightly, and thought, “I am wearing very exciting underpants!”

I spent a lovely, contemplative evening picnicking and walking around a deserted beach in the suit (though it was, alas, too cold to swim); I crawled into my sleeping bag at 10 p.m. The suit’s smoothness felt satiny and delightful against the sleeping bag’s slippery insides: a hot dog in a bun. The surf raged, the stars twinkled. I felt new and brimming. Jude at last.

But then, just after midnight: blindingly bright car headlights aimed at my head. “Hey! Hey!” yelled a male voice from inside an East Hampton Marine Patrol vehicle. The officer then asked, with some irritation, “Why are you sleeping on the beach?” Groggily, I explained, “I just bought a new bathing suit.” He snorted and said: “You just bought a new bathing suit! What kind of reason is that?” I mumbled an incoherent answer. He wrote me a summons.

It was too late to call anyone. Back up in Amagansett, I sat on a bench on Route 27 and waited for a 4:20 a.m. jitney back home. “Jude, Jude, Jude,” I thought, “Where have you taken me?” Many inebriated 20-something revelers sauntered by, including a young woman skittering in high heels who, on hearing that I was waiting for a 4:20 bus, gushed: “Oh my God. Oh my God.”

Moments later, I took my summons out of my pocket and gazed at it. I contemplated the embarrassment of a forthcoming appearance at the East Hampton Town Justice Court. I thought, I’ll definitely need to be at my most confident and cool for that. I thought, I’ll definitely need to be at the top of my game. I thought, I’ll definitely need to wear the suit.

Bikini Bashing

Okay. I'm not here to bash bikinis. I have nothing against bikinis or the women who wear them. What I do have issues with is exactly what this article addresses. Magazines, commercials, gossip news, etc making women never feel they're good enough to wear bikinis.

Too much stomach.

Too much thigh.

Too little boob.

Who cares!?

If you like it.
If you feel good in it.
WEAR IT!
...and everyone else can screw off!

*       *       *

‘Bikini-Ready’? Who’s Judging?

By CATHERINE SAINT LOUIS

EVERY spring, as sure as cherry blossoms bloom, so does the notion that women should diet, exercise and even liposuction their way to bikini-ready bodies. Magazines like Shape and Self reinforce the idea that preparation is essential, with months-long bikini body countdowns (100-calorie snack tips included) and workout DVDs like “Bikini Ready Fast!” as if the beach reveal were a test on par with the MCAT and only a slacker would settle for a one-piece.

“It really sends the message that you’re not worthy right now to put on a suit,” said Malia Mills, a swimsuit designer whose brand’s motto is “Love Thy Differences.” Ms. Mills, 44, said shoppers often declare in one of her 10 stores: “I just wanted to see what you had. I’m coming back when I lose five pounds.”

As our culture increasingly enshrines physical perfection, the bikini has come to inspire dread and awe. It wasn’t always so. In the 1960s, when bellybutton-baring suits first became popular in America, “it was a youthful phenomenon definitely,” said Sarah Kennedy, the author of “The Swimsuit: A History of Twentieth-Century Fashions.” Then the high-fashion set and movie stars began to put on bikinis, and by the ’70s, she said, the bikini was “worn by all ages.”

And a few extra pounds didn’t disqualify anyone, considering the fitness revolution was still roughly a decade away. (In the book there’s a 1940s photograph of a fresh-faced still-brunet Marilyn Monroe looking smashing in a blue-and-white striped two-piece, a roll of pale flesh at her midsection.)

Back then, bikini preparation was starkly laissez-faire by today’s grooming standards. In her recently published literary memoir, “Art and Madness,” Anne Roiphe wrote that in 1965, she suspected that a suitor was into her because of, not in spite of, the “tufts of dark hair that stuck out of the top of my bikini.”

But today it’s assumed that only the lean, muscular, hairless and ab-defined will feel comfortable in a bikini. “It’s become difficult to feel natural with a normal body,” Ms. Kennedy said. “Fatism has taken over. It’s O.K. to be mean to lumpy, lardy people. It’s a sort of subtle intolerance towards people that’s very bad.”

Thanks to the ubiquity of cameras, wearing a bikini is now scary even for gorgeous celebrities. Remember how Jennifer Love Hewitt was pilloried in 2007 for the crime of wearing a bandeau without being a size 0? Helen Mirren was accused of having had surgery when she dared to flaunt her (taut, toned) 62-year-old stomach in a tomato-red bikini a year later.

“It’s about everyone everywhere having a comment, and they are anonymous,” said Gabrielle Reece, the former volleyball star and now a fitness guru, who has also been captured bare-stomached by the paparazzi. “The bathing suit is really a metaphor for all the ways we can approach a lot of things,” she said. “Why would we punish ourselves when we don’t have to? Why dread that?”

But the bikini has become the star of several fear-inspiring marketing campaigns. A recent advertisement for Yoplait Light features an itsy-bitsy yellow-and-red polka dotted bikini hanging on a wall as a future award for the diligent yogurt eater.

Nivea has a Goodbye Cellulite, Hello Bikini! Challenge, which prods women to slim down and buy its products. Nivea also sponsors the Cosmopolitan Magazine Bikini Bash, which last year involved 100 lithe dancers in blue-and-white ruffled bikinis tossing their hair violently to the Midi Mafia’s song “Two-Piece” in front of 1,000 attendees at the Planet Hollywood resort in Las Vegas. The two male singers of “Two-Piece,” fully clothed, belted, “You all look like models off the cover of Cosmo.”

Amansala, a “bikini boot camp,” in Ibiza, Spain, and Tulum, Mexico, sells six-night stays starting at $1,875. “Our society definitely has a stigma of bikini readiness — my business thrives on that,” said Melissa Perlman, an owner of the resort, which she said mostly attracts women in their 30s and 40s. “But at the same time, we send a different message that you don’t have to be perfect. Feel good, take care of yourself, and looking good in a bikini will follow.”

Would-be attendees often call ahead asking, “Do all the women look like those on your Web site?” (That is, easy on the eyes and the jiggle.) Ms. Perlman said she was considering starting “a program for larger women who don’t want to be around women who look hot in their bikinis, but say, ‘I want to do this.’ ”

On April 12, Dr. Elie Levine, a plastic surgeon, and his wife, Dr. Jody Levine, a dermatologist, hosted a bikini season prep event at their Manhattan practice to cater to the worried (19 women and one man showed up). The doctors’ press release warned, “Summer is about revealing yourself and can be dreaded if your body is not ready,” then went on to list tips such as “zap away embarrassing veins” or “boost bikini confidence with lipo for stubborn areas.”

This month, when I visited the doctors, at the end of the interview, I hoisted my shirt, pointed to the crepey skin under my bellybutton, and grabbed a pinch of fat that wasn’t there before childbirth, back in my triathlete days. The Levines’ prescription: liposuction, a skin-tightening procedure, or a tummy tuck, which costs $10,000, with a painful recovery.

It might just be cheaper to gain a fresh perspective. “If you feel your body is strong, and you’re in good shape, you’re halfway there,” said Norma Kamali, 65, the designer of (among other things) modestly retro bathing suits, who now also has a wellness cafe in Manhattan. “You’re not going to go out looking for surgery to fill up your breasts, you’ll be satisfied and comfortable.”

Not all women let the camera-phone-wielding bikini police (or their own self-criticism) stop them from enjoying a two-piece. Ms. Mills calls this type a “good-attitude girl.”

“She is a phenomenon and totally inspiring,” she said. “She is of any age, any body, she has a totally great attitude, because she has had a come-to-Jesus moment with her body.”

Just a little Nip and Tuck.

I admit.
I'm a photoshopper. 

Goodbye sags under my eyes. 

Goodbye giant blemish on my chin.

Are there parts of my body I'd like to lift, tuck and suck? Sure. Doesn't mean I'm going to (no offense to anyone but I still don't trust the medical techniques out there). 

I think there is a time and a place for these alterations: i.e., getting rid of that giant red pimple on my nose before sending out the family Christmas cards.

There are some physical body-modifications I have a harder time with. I'm all for freedom of self and you can do to yourself what you want...I just start worrying when parent's are making these choices for their children and when modifications turn to addiction. But then I also know I'm not in any place to make the call for others.

Beauty changes with time and everyone's view of what "beauty" is, is different.

*     *     *

Capturing Beauty, With All Its Flaws

By Simone S. Oliver

May 17, 2011

IN 2010 there were more than 12 million cosmetic procedures — from breast implants to Botox injections — performed in the United States, according to the American Society of Plastic Surgeons. Meanwhile, there is at least one mother who has injected Botox into her child, a beauty pageant contestant (as seen on “Good Morning America” last week); a steady stream of models in uneasy relationships with their body weight, and magazine layouts in which skin color and body shapes have been digitally modified.

All of these subjects are examined in “Beauty Culture,” the first fashion- and beauty-themed exhibition to be held at the Annenberg Space for Photography in Los Angeles, the heartland of Hollywood goddesses and plastic surgery. A celebrity-filled gala will be held tonight for the show, which opens on May 21 and runs through Nov. 27.

As visitors walk along the winding halls of the exhibition space, they will find 175 images by more than 100 photographers, from straight-up glamour portraits to more-unsettling images, such as a needle entering a lip.

“We wanted to talk about the ugly side of the beauty industry alongside the beauty,” said Kohle Yohannan, its curator. But, he said, “I didn’t want it to just be a finger wag. This is the beginning of a dialogue. it’s not a statement.”

Patricia Lanza, Annenberg’s director of talent and content, asked Mr. Yohannan to be involved in “Beauty Culture” after she visited “Model as Muse,” a 2009 exhibition at the Metropolitan Museum of Art that Mr. Yohannan curated with Harold Koda.

Mr. Yohannan said it was important to him to present the pictures in “chapters,” such as “The Marilyn Syndrome,” “Beauty Inc.: The $300 Billion Cosmetics Industry” and “What Color Is Beauty?”

“The story of beauty is complicated,” he said. “Trying to generalize it is lazy.”

Many of the photographs were shot by heavyweights in the fashion industry such as Steven Meisel, and some are by lesser-known artists, including Nino Muñoz, who has worked extensively with the model Gisele Bundchen.

One of the show’s highlights is a 30-minute documentary that will play every hour. It was directed by the photographer Lauren Greenfield, whose prints are also featured.

Ms. Greenfield has covered beauty-related subjects like aging throughout her career, mostly from a cultural perspective. During her research for the film, she said she learned to look at the subject from a biological standpoint with the help of Nancy Etcoff, an assistant clinical professor at Harvard Medical School, who is interviewed in the film. Dr. Etcoff wrote the book “Survival of the Prettiest,” an exploration of the biological relationship people have with beauty.

Ms. Greenfield said her dialogue with Dr. Etcoff “gave me perspective when shooting things like eating disorders, plastic surgery, fashion.”

For her part, Dr. Etcoff said she thought the exhibition could make people “think again about many issues: about what they consider beautiful and why, why it is part of human nature and what role certain images and photographers and media play in our ideas about the boundaries of beauty.”

Digital photography has made it easy to manipulate how people appear, resulting in unrealistic examples of beauty that may skew some people’s expectations of themselves and others. The exhibition examines this with the Beauty Culture Digital Salon, where guests can alter a photo of themselves and choose a “before” or “after” picture.

It is tempting to think that the digital revolution introduced new levels of fakery, said Zed Nelson, a photographer featured in “Beauty Culture” who has spent part of his career considering the effects of the globalization of Western beauty ideals. But retouching and clever lighting are as old as portraiture itself, he pointed out.

Such manipulation, he said, is “kind of like the apple in the Garden of Eden: it’s so readily available that people use it without thinking. And I think that’s had an effect. Some images in magazines, they’re almost becoming illustrations instead of photographs.”

There has been some backlash against such images. For example, the May 2010 issue of Marie Claire had Jessica Simpson, without makeup, on the cover. In this month’s issue of Harper’s Bazaar, Diane Von Furstenberg, photographed bare-faced by Chuck Close, says she believes that imperfections and wrinkles give a person character.

But such experiments are rare.

“We have a Venus for every era,” Mr. Yohannan said. “And the war that pop culture wages on the female body should be looked at closely. These models are not the norm.”

One current pop goddess, Lady Gaga (on the cover of May’s Harper’s Bazaar), is challenging beauty norms. There are no photos of her in “Beauty Culture,” but she may share some of its goals.

“When everybody around you has had their breasts enlarged, their teeth whitened and their skin peeled, then you become the odd one out, you become the freak,” said Mr. Nelson, the photographer. “That’s the scary thing. And so anything that draws attention to that is a good thing.”

28 Day Challenge - Check In

So I decided instead of posting a blog every day and boring the crap out of you all with "I walked around the building."...."I ran stairs"....blah blah blah. I'd do more of a weekly check in. 

Today is Day 16 of 28.

I've entered into my Outlook calendar 3 times to get up from my desk and go take a walk around the building (not including the walking I do on my lunch break). So far it's working great. It not only gives my eyes a break from the computer screen but it gets me up and moving and keeping warm (my office building has no real heat and I've been chilly lately). 

It's nice to have a "fall-back exercise" as it were. My goal for this 28-day challenge was to develop a new healthy habit. Adding in three walks to my schedule (including a pop-up window telling me to get out and go) every work-day helps me accomplish that. Doesn't mean though I'm not trying to do other activities outside of these walks. 

Thursday we went to the pool and swam for a while.

Saturday we went to Multnomah Falls and hiked (I didn't make it to the top but mostly because I didn't want to make the family wait below for me for too long).

It's interesting some of the things I'm observing/noticing over the past few weeks (most of which I'm sure is in my head). 

First I feel more emotional than I normally am. I know that exercising is supposed to release endorphins and therefore put you in a better mood...but that's not really what I've been experiencing. I've been out on a walk and had a burst of anger come from deep in my core. This weekend I had to go home and lay in bed to cry after a ridiculous comment from my brow-wax lady. No euphoria. No smile across my face. Just anger and tears. (WTF?)

The other thing I feel is that I've not been losing weight but gaining it. Now I know this is only Day 16 and I can't expect a miracle. I'd expect more to see no change...not an increase. Like I said this could just be in my head. But pants that don't fit, shirts that feel tighter than before, looking at pictures taken of me and seeing a larger and larger double chin. 

It's frustrating. 

I'm sticking to it though.

Coming Out Fat.

A friend recently posted a link to this article called "Guys Who Like Fat Chicks" (from the Village Voice) on her facebook page. I was a little hesitant about reading it but I trust her judgement and most times agree or like the other articles she posts. 

Here's a link to the article.

Okay. So I'm not sure why articles always feel like they have to parallel their cause with coming out as gay....but this article doesn't linger on it for long. It is nice to see an article that addresses the "FA" and not just BBW's with pride. A little on the long side (and pretty heavy on a single interviewee) but a good read nonetheless. 

I'm always excited/interested to read articles addressing the topic of plus size (the term I prefer to identify with) people (not just women) having normal relationships. That we (and the people who find us attractive) are not freaks of nature, we're not abnormal or something to be hidden and only talked about behind closed doors.  

*     *      *

I come from a family of curvy women - not all of them are plus size, but there are few without hips, butts, breasts and other curves. 

I was destined to be a curvy lady. 

At my smallest (obviously post-puberty) I was a 14 and at my largest (a few years ago) was a size 28 (at around 280lbs). Today I'm around 260 and a size 26. 

I'm not ashamed. I'm not trying to hide my body behind muumuus and oversized sweats. 

It's true I say I "carry my weight well" because I think I do. I dress stylish and appropriate and have had people assume my weight/size was smaller than what it was in actuality. 

It's also true that I'm currently in the middle of a "28 Day Challenge" in which I'm trying to have more exercise in my daily life. I'm not doing that because I'm ashamed of how I look. I'm doing it so I can feel healthier, so I can battle the Seasonal Depression that knocks you over when living in such a grey part of the country.

*     *     *

I've had boyfriends, when I was, from one extreme of weight to another. None (that I know) of them came out as "Fat Admirers" but obviously they liked a little extra something since they were dating me. Most of them were "breast-men" and as you can see I've got them covered there. 

Even with a fair number of beaus growing up (five in the first year and a half of HS before dating my "high school sweetheart" the remaining two years) I did struggle with self esteem issues around my weight. After my HS sweetheart and I broke up I went through a depression that really took it (the wanting to date) out of me. I just didn't feel attractive or desirable. He didn't tell me I was fat, or give me an ultimatum to lose weight. We just broke up (like you do when you're in high school).

For the most part (after highschool) I just wasn't interested in dating. I did toy around with internet dating here and there. I remember one date I went on. He took me to see the (newer) Planet of the Apes. (Yippee?) I didn't even bother asking him up afterwards. I said "Thanks, have a good night" and closed the car door.

Then there was the guy in college. The rebel who drank vodka out of a 7-up bottle during our English Freshman seminar. The smooth talker who, when I was upset with him, would spout lines from cheesy romance movies (I'm talking "You complete me" level). The one who as soon as I slept with him wouldn't give me the time of day....yeah not a highlight in the Men-In-My-Life.

Then somewhere a few years ago things changed - I opened up to the idea of dating again and as a result met my sweetie. (See our love story here). 

*     *     *

I think it's wonderful that more and more people are "coming out" as appreciators and admirers of curvy/plump/heavy/plus-size women and men...let's not forget those of us who appreciate a stockier built man. 

I'm a plus size woman. I like men with meat on their bones. I like someone who enjoys going out and trying new food and doesn't expect me to eat a garden salad when there's pasta on the menu (I mean really now I'm 1/2 Italian!)

It bothers me sometimes when I see/hear friends express feelings about being unattractive. Everyone is desirable to someone. I truly believe that you just need to embrace yourself and see yourself as deserving and desirable before you can expect others too (or at least before you can expect to start noticing that others do already)

To close I just have this to say. 

If you don't understand how or why someone is attracted to me.... Just don't worry about it, no one's making you take me out in the first place.

28 Day Challenge - Day 9 Check In

"Today, I will try to feed myself when I am hungry.

Today, I will try to be attentive to how foods taste and make me feel.

Today, I will try to choose foods that I like and that make me feel good.

Today, I will try to honor my body's signals of fullness.

Today, I will try to find an enjoyable way to move my body.

Today, i will try to look kindly at my body and to treat it with love and respect"

-Live Well Pledge

Today we took my coworker out to lunch for his birthday (that was this past week). He just started a 28 day (different challenge) cleanse - eating (in phases) only raw food at the moment. So we went to a Vegan restaurant in town called Blossoming Lotus.

Even though I'm far from vegan (there's just no way I could abandon cheese) and I just can't wrap my head around the idea of "nut-cheese". I still had a yummy lunch; the Southwest Bowl - brown rice, spicy butternut & black bean chili, steamed greens topped with avocado ranch, roasted pepper sour cream, scallions and cilantro.

While I felt (very) out of place and the lunch was good, a friend put it best when she said "a plate of fried chicken and mashed potatoes covered in country gravy wouldn't be sitting as well right about now".

I came back to work and have done one quick lap of stairs (a figure eight basically) - down one, up another two (don't ask how that works). 

I plan on another few of those laps as the afternoon goes. (But I'm trying to be productive at work at the same time). :)

28 Day Challenge - Day 5 Check In

So this is a mid-point check-in. I ended up going and having lunch with people today (instead of spending my lunch walking and then eating afterwards at my desk). I did eat a light lunch of beef pho (well 1/2 the bowl...the portions were huge) and haven't snacked really at all today (which often is another weakness). 

Since I didn't have my lunch break to walk I've been trying to do little bursts throughout the day. This morning I walked (practically in a jog) the three blocks from the train to the bus (mostly because I wanted to catch the earlier one and not be late to work). And I just got back from walking around the building (with extra attention to running up/down the stairs). Basically the building is shaped like this:


(stairs -->)    [[[[[[[ _________________________]]]]]]]] (<-stairs)
                             |                                                |
                             |                                                |
                             |                                                |
                   =        |                                                |
 (stairs->)     [[[[[[[[|                                                |]]]]]] (<-stairs)                 
                   =        |                                                |
                             |                                                |
                             |                                                |
                             |________________________|

I ran up or down (doing a loop on the side) stairs as I passed by (to help quicken my heart rate).

I still have an hour and a half left at work and I hope to do the same loop at least once or twice more (*fingers crossed*).
                            

28 Day Challenge - Day 4 Check In

Today the skies are crystal clear blue, hardly even a white fluffy cloud to be seen, and the temperatures are an amazing 71 degrees! So nice I wore a dress! :) What better way to celebrate an amazingly gorgeous day then going out for a walk in it!? 

So off I went, down 1 flight of stairs, 2x around the building and back up the stairs. I didn't nearly walk as long as I wanted but with the improper shoes on I was getting shin splints. So I stopped after the 2nd loop and did some stretching (the best I could with a dress on). 

To help increase the amount I'm exercising today - I plan on catching the bus into downtown that makes me walk 3 blocks instead of the bus that drops me off right in front of the train station.  

On top of increasing my exercise I started to wonder what my calorie intake was. I've always considered myself a fairly healthy eater. We rarely have "junk food" or sweets in the house (just don't count the over whelming number of cupcakes made these past few weeks for my sister's bridal shower. Most of those are given away anyways)....my weakness is carbs. Pasta, breads, rice...etc. I try to counter them with salads and vegetables but I don't think I'll ever be able to give up carbohydrates completely. 

 

Anyway. I'm not necessarily looking to "cut back" on my calories...but I did want to take them into consideration. So last night I downloaded a Calorie Counter app and so far I don't think I'm doing that badly. For breakfast I had 2 pieces of sourdough toast, for lunch smoked salmon and as a snack celery sticks and hummus. 

Here's to day four.

4 down 24 to go baby!

28 Day Challenge - Day 3 Check In

So I've had a jam-packed busy day today. One meeting after another after another. However, I knew that today was going to be busy and it would be hard to find time to do a walk at lunch (in all honesty it's 3:48 and I haven't taken a lunch break yet - I ate my salad in between meetings but no real break). 

So, since I knew I had a busy day planned, and the weather has been so agreeable lately, I took the bus this morning instead of the train. 

May not seem like a big deal. EXCEPT....

When I take the train to work I only walk from the house to the car, the car to the train, the train to a bus and a bus to work. In total I walk (maybe) 3 blocks. And if you've ever been to Portland you know we have teeny-tiny blocks.

However, when I walk to the bus (that takes me directly to the office and requires me being out of the house a 1/2 hour earlier than the train) I walk a 1/2 mile! (and then another 2-3 blocks to get to the office). 

I count today as a success. A half mile in the morning, taking the long way to get places today in the office, and I plan to take the long way (walking) when getting home this evening.

(We'll see how I'm feeling when I get home. We might have a 2-part day).

28 Day Challenge - Day 2 Check In

I would prefer to check in with my 28 day challenge after each accomplishment (however with yesterday being such a busy day I did yesterday's check in earlier today).

Here's my Day 2 check in though - right on time. 

Academic Building

Question for you. Have you ever worked out and just had a (random) release of emotions during it? My Day 2 exercise was power walking at lunch. I did 3 laps around the building plus up/down four flights of stairs. Within my first lap I was nearly overwhelmed by the amount of frustration and anger that burst forth from me. Not at anyone or anything particular just in general. 

By the end I had completely walked it out of my system. 

It was GREAT!

28 Day Challenge - Day 1 Check In

Sister-in-law Gayle, Me, Sister Kat (photo taken by Emily)

So yesterday not only started the first day of May (where has this year gone?) but also the first day of my 28 day Challenge (to be healthier and exercise daily). Yesterday was also my sister's bridal shower (that I've been planning for almost 2 months). It turned out amazing and while I didn't go running or swim laps in the pool I think all the carrying boxes and totes from the house to the clubhouse, the lifting of bottle water crates and bags of serving platters, the cleaning, the decorating, the running around and playing hostess....this should (and in my book does) count towards my "Daily Exercise". I was so tired after 8 hours (the party itself was only 2) I could barely move, or even get up off the couch, it felt as if I'd been working out for those 8 hours. 

Here's to Day 1 of my 28 Day Challenge!

My 28 Day Challenge.

I read a friend's blog today about a 28 day challenge in May and I think it's such a great idea. It's so much harder to get into a good habit than (continue or re) start a "bad" habit. 

 

I've been trying to increase how much I exercise.
Nothing extreme.

I'm just trying to start a good habit. 

I'm not preparing for a marathon (please, with these boobs? Even if I was fit enough to run a marathon I'd need to duct tape the girls down). 

I'm not looking to loose X amount of pounds (although looking at pictures I have noticed an increase in weight - especially in the face. Yes I'd like to loose this weight but I'm not buying a scale. I'm not taking measurements or stressing about my BMI....see my opinion on BMI here). 

I am (usually) happy with my body. I can stand in front of a mirror naked and not criticize my thighs or my love handles. It's taken work but I'm comfortable in my skin. Doesn't mean I can't try to be a healthier (and happier) me.  

I'm going to try exercise every day for 28 days (since May has 31 days that allows for 3 days of "freebies"). Whether that's walking laps in my office building (hooray for an old building with three stories and four different stairwells allowing for loops), water aerobics in the pool, (doing my best) riding the (semi-broken) stationary bicycle in the clubhouse or speed walking around the condo complex. 

I'll try and be good about posting updates here (I think accountability is a good motivator), so feel free to send your inspirational and positive support this way. 

Here's to a new good habit. 

One Size Fits Nobody

I read this and had oh so many thoughts along the way. So to make it easiest I'm going to just color my thoughts/comments as you read along.

One Size Fits Nobody: Seeking a Steady 4 or a 10

By Stephanie Clifford

In one store, you’re a Size 4, in another a Size 8, and in another a Size 10 — all without gaining an ounce.

It’s a familiar problem for many women, as standard sizing has never been very standard, ever since custom clothing gave way to ready-to-wear.

So, baffled women carry armfuls of the same garment in different sizes into the dressing room. They order several sizes of the same shirt online, just to get the right fit. I often times refuse to buy online just because I don't have the chance to try clothes on first - and I don't want to be out the shipping costs. However, then I'm reduced to the limited number of clothing stores/styles/options for plus size women that don't include online shopping.

Now, a handful of companies are tackling the problem of sizes that are unreliable. Some are pushing more informative labels. Some are designing multiple versions of a garment to fit different body shapes. Lane Bryant has this with their pants/jeans. You're either a "square", "triangle" or "circle"...of course I'm none of the three. I've gone in with the same pair of pants in the three different shapes and there's always something not right. Too much sag in the butt, too tight in the stomach, makes my thighs look bigger around then my hips. Etc. And one is offering full-body scans at shopping malls, telling a shopper what sizes she should try among the various brands.

“For the consumer to go out and navigate which one do I match with is a huge challenge, and causes frustration and returns,” said Tanya Shaw, an entrepreneur working on a fit system. “So many women tie their self-esteem to the size on the tag.” Sadly this isn't just because of the frustration of poor labeling. Thank you media.

As the American population has grown more diverse, sizes have become even less reliable. Over the years, many brands have changed measurements so that a woman who previously wore a 12 can now wear a 10 or an 8, a practice known as “vanity sizing.”

In men’s clothes, the dimensions are usually stated in inches; women’s clothing involves more guesswork.

Take a woman with a 27-inch waist. In Marc Jacobs’s high-end line, she is between an 8 and a 10. At Chico’s, she is a triple 0. And that does not consider whether the garment fits in the hips and bust. (Let’s not get into length; there is a reason most neighborhood dry cleaners also offer tailoring.) The length issue is also one of my biggest issues (aside from finding cute clothes in my size). "Averages" are usually at least four inches too long and sometimes petite's turn into high-waters! I'm only 5'1"-5'2" but this shouldn't be that big of a deal.

Ms. Shaw, the entrepreneur, is chief executive of a company called MyBestFit that addresses the problem. It is setting up kiosks in malls to offer a free 20-second full-body scan — a lot like the airport, minus the pat-down alternative that T.S.A. agents offer. Oh great. One more piece of invasive radiation filled equipment to scan our bodies.

Lauren VanBrackle, 20, a student in Philadelphia, tried MyBestFit when she was shopping last weekend.

“I can be anywhere from a 0 at Ann Taylor to a 6 at American Eagle,” she said. “It obviously makes it difficult to shop.” This time, the scanner suggested that at American Eagle, she should try a 4 in one style and a 6 in another. Ms. VanBrackle said she tried the jeans on and was impressed: “That machine, in a 30-second scan, it tells you what to do.”

The customer steps into a circular booth, fully dressed. A wand rotates around her, emitting low-power radio waves that record about 200,000 body measurements, figuring out things like thigh circumference. <- No thanks. I don't need to know how round my thigh is. Thank you though.

Next, the system matches the customer’s measurements to clothes in its database. MyBestFit currently measures clothes from about 50 stores, including Old Navy, Eddie Bauer and Talbots.

Customers then receive a printout of the sizes at each store that ought to fit the customer best. The retailers pay a fee when they appear in the results, but they cannot pay to be included in the results; the rankings are based solely on fit. (The company saves the data, with ID numbers but not names, and may give aggregate information to retailers as feedback.)

Don Thomas, who manages the Eddie Bauer store at the King of Prussia Mall outside Philadelphia, said the system was helpful to shoppers. “Nine times out of 10, if left on their own, they will choose the wrong size pant,” he said. With a printout, “if it says they’re a 4 or a 6, they’re a 4 or a 6, generally. So it’s really good for the customer who’s time-starved, which we all are.”

Ms. Shaw says there are plans for 13 more scanning machines in malls along the East Coast and in California by the end of the year.

The sizing variations are a big contributor to $194 billion in clothing purchases returned in 2010, or more than 8 percent of all clothing purchases, according to the National Retail Federation.

The scanners are a modern solution to an old problem. Studying dress sizes in Vogue advertisements from 1922 on, Alaina Zulli, a designer focusing on costume history, found clothing sizes have been irregular for decades.

A woman with a 32-inch bust would have worn a Size 14 in Sears’s 1937 catalog. By 1967, she would have worn an 8, Ms. Zulli found.

Today, she would wear a zero. I'm sorry but maybe it's because I've never been a size "zero" but I don't know how this can/is a size!?

Plenty of people have tried to address these arbitrary sizes. Advocating a labeling system called Fitlogic over the last few years, an entrepreneur, Cricket Lee, discovered just how difficult it is to change manufacturers’ approach to size.

Her labeling system divides women’s bodies into three shapes, straight, hourglass or bottom-heavy, and a Fitlogic label carries both the standard size and the shape. What about those of us that are two of the three? Or not 100% of any one?

Ms. Lee did tests in the mid-2000s with manufacturers like Jones Apparel and retailers like Nordstrom. But retailers said consumers had trouble grasping the concept. “The manufacturers were so afraid of producing more than one fit in the very beginning,” she said. And that my friends is why we have the muumuu in many plus size stores.

Still, she said, she will soon try to sell the sizing system again.

Some brands are taking their own approaches to make the fitting room less demoralizing. Mary Alderete, vice president for women’s global marketing at Levi’s, said, “When we try on 10 pairs of jeans to buy one, the reason you feel bad is because you think something’s wrong with you.”

Last fall, the company introduced Curve ID, a line that offers three styles, depending on how rounded a woman’s backside is — slight, demi and bold. (Levi’s is now testing a fourth style, called supreme curve.) Each of the three styles includes about 29 fits and colors, and dozens of sizes. Ms. Alderete said the company had sold more than one million pairs of the Curve jeans.

Marie-Eve Faust, the program director of fashion merchandising at Philadelphia University, called the Levi’s effort “a good start.”

“The next step is to have the major players sit together, manufacturers, retailers, brands, and say ‘This type of label should be appropriate for all of us. Let’s standardize,’ ” she said.

Dr. Faust said she had been discussing a new kind of label that takes into account the wearer’s shape, but expected retailers to bristle.

Still, Dr. Faust said, change is needed. This is something I have to agree on. The fact that an obscene number of women are walking around with the wrong bra size on - you can only imagine how many are squeezing into a too tight of dress because they're "always a size 8" or drowning in pants that make them look like they've got a loaded diaper because "they are comfortable".

“It would be nice just to take the pant, look at the label and say, ‘That should fit me,’ ” she said.